Friday, November 9, 2012

Mouth over mind

Bonsoir! C'est Aurélie (qui est terrible avec le blog)! 
Ballet, flute lessons, school, and working with children has kept quite busy and unable to blog as much as I'd like, but I'll get better with updating. I promise. :)

Sabine and I had plans for a Halloween party, but that didn't work out exactly as we had expected. Instead of trying to make the night more reminiscent of the American celebration, Sabine came over and helped me to learn Spanish. I'm currently in the middle of redoing my room, so things were kind-of a mess.

Sabine brought her favorite grammar book, and she tried to introduce me to stem-changing verbs! I was a little freaked out, seeing as I couldn't even conjugate a regular Spanish verb! While I'm exited to host an exchange student from Spain, I sometimes wished that she were from Germany since I actually know German. I realize that the student will be coming here to improve her French, but I'd like to practice my language skills, too.

After doing this for half and hour, I grew bored. I hate to say that because Sabine was very nice to help me out, but I just couldn't focus. I wanted to do something fun or have one of our usual serious conversations. I haven't had one of those with Sabine for awhile, and there were many things that I wanted to get off my chest, beginning with Julien.
Julien was a good friend of ours, but I couldn't help but like him as more than a friend. I felt that we were very similar personality-wise. We were quiet, reserved, and somewhat shy. We both hated getting up in front of the class to give presentations, and we weren't always content with our families. He was a good person to talk to, seeing that he always listened and gave good advice. As much as I hate to admit it, I have told him things that I have never even dared to tell Sabine.
I never talked about my crush on him. In fact, I never talked about any crush that I have ever had in the past. I was too shy about it, and even thinking about my crushes at the time made me blush. However, I was going to mention it to Sabine because I wanted her advice. She was always pushing me to be more outgoing (even if she wasn't always), and she provided me with useful advice most of the time. 
"Sabine," I began. I felt my hands become clammy, and my stomach ache. "Je dois te dire quelque chose."
Sabine laughed. "Ah, dis-moi tout!"
"J'aime Julien," I replied.
"Plus qu'un ami?" Sabine asked, her smile turning into a frown and her enthusiasm fading away.
"Ouais," I nervously said. Sabine looked at me and then at the ground.

Sabine stood up and looked away from me. Her voice sounded upset. "My mom just texted me. I have to go. I don't want to get in trouble or anything."
I patted her on the back. "Sabine, since when do you listen to her? You've always spent the night regardless. What about those movies we were going to watch? What about teaching me more Spanish?"
She sighed. "Maybe another time. I'm not in the mood to face one of her bad moods."

"Text me tomorrow or something, okay?" Sabine said as she left.
"Are you sure everything is okay? We can talk about things before you go," I suggested, trying to make things better. I knew why Sabine was leaving, and it certainly wasn't because of her mom this time.
"We can talk later. Look, I really have to go. My mom keeps texting me." Sabine murmured.
"A demain..." My voice faded. 

After Sabine left, I sat by the door and sulked. Her mom never texted her. She didn't even have her phone with her. Sabine's mood changed when I began talking about Julien. Did Sabine have a crush on Julien, too? I assumed so, based on her actions, though she never told me! Although I wouldn't have known, I still felt terrible bringing it up. I could tell that Sabine admired him, even if she didn't tell me. I just wasn't thinking. I didn't want another friend to come in the way of our friendship. I didn't even want to think about it...not until tomorrow, anyway.

Have you ever said the wrong thing to a friend? How did you resolve it?

~
Aurélie

1 comment:

Bolton Girls said...

I am so sorry, I have done this before, but it might take her a little while to think it through but she should realize that you can both have a crush on him. I almost always find that a note saying you are sorry goes a long way too.

Hugs,
Taryn